What Are You Thankful For?

I’ll start out by asking a fairly simple but nuanced question: what are you thankful for?

As I write this, my wife is making pie crust (from scratch – like everything else she does) while one of my daughters is learning from her; I’ll be deep frying the turkey later and will enjoy the time with family this evening.

Today is Thanksgiving 2023 – and I am thankful for A LOT.

I decided to write a brief but impactful post about some of the things I am most thankful for, how they are impacting my life for good, and maybe inspire others to be thankful, too.

I Am Thankful For My Wife

Just one of the MANY things my wife does for our family

Seriously; my wife is a rockstar. She is feminine and demure; she’s protective, inspiring, and educational – a willing partner who is submissive, lets me lead, and is supportive of what’s going on in our family and frame.

In this life, there is no decision that will impact you more than who you choose to marry and spend the rest of your life with. If you marry someone who is combative, difficult and is looking for “someone to handle me,” then you will probably have a troubled marriage – to put it nicely.

Conversely, if you were selective and choosy, had boundaries, were clear in your expectations, and had difficult conversations while dating to vet your potential spouse, then you are further along than most people. Do you have the same worldview? How compatible are your views on raising kids? Do both of you even want kids? How do you deal with financial troubles – or even disagreements?

The above isn’t foolproof nor a guarantee; indeed, people change throughout life. However, most people marry for lust, and when the infatuation has worn off – or the looks – there is little substance to their marriage. Enter no-fault divorce.

 

IT IS FAR BETTER FOR YOU TO MARRY SOMEONE WHO HAS GREAT CHARACTER.

 

I am NOT suggesting looks are unimportant, but outward beauty WILL fade, and what you are left with – the other person’s character, beliefs, views, etc. – is front and center.

Is that something you can live with? If, at the beginning of your relationship, it isn’t, then I would abandon ship.

Suffice it to say, I am extremely grateful and thankful for my wife.

I Am Thankful For My Kids

Kids are an amazing treasure and gift

Kids can be a source of extreme heartache; I know far too many who have lamented how their kids have grown up without them as they spent time working on the road (This is why I am so adamant about fighting for some form of work-life balance; your kids are only young once, after all). I have also known a number of people whose kids have gone off the rails and became addicts, derelicts, etc., and the pain was immense. For some, the pain seems to be continual, too.

Kids can also be a source of enormous joy, too. Hearing a child’s laughter is a thing of absolute grace and one of my favorite sounds. Watching the excitement as they discover and learn things warms the soul. And, despite a foul day you have had, a child can climb on your lap, ask you to read to them, and just melt your frustration away.

As you can read – and intuitively know if you have kids – kids can be a source of both pain and joy. In that vein, they can be double-edged swords, so to speak.

A story for another time, but my adult kid (23 yo M) and the circumstances surrounding him were full of pain, disappointment, and anger (It’s important I stress it wasn’t him but the circumstances – that’s an important distinction).

Since I started early, for years, I was looking at being 37 without having a dependent kid. What’s more, I didn’t want anymore, either; the trauma was significant enough for me to seriously take that stance.

Life had other plans for me, though.

And as I write this, I have an 11-year-old daughter, an almost 9-year-old daughter, and a 6 year old son. They bring me so much joy in life that when I look back, I am extremely grateful I didn’t get what I “wanted.”

Sometimes the best blessings are the ones you don’t get.

Nowadays, my wife is a stay-at-home mom (has been since our oldest was born), homeschools them, takes field trips frequently, and spends more time with her family than the vast majority of mothers get to. Indeed, Fortune reports on a Gallop poll from 2016:

 

“According to a new Gallup report, which surveyed more than 323,500 American adults, a majority of working moms with kids under age 18 said they would prefer to stay at home and take care of their house and family.

Among moms employed full- or part-time, 54% said they would prefer to stay home, while only 40% said they prefer to work outside the home.

And it’s not that the grass is greener on the other side: Even among moms who weren’t currently employed, the majority said they would rather stay home (57%), while just 37% said they would prefer to work.”

 

I am extremely thankful for the kids I have, the joy they bring, the sacrifices my wife and I have made in order for ONE INCOME TO BE ENOUGH, and how I get to be able to provide and protect.

 

I Am Thankful For Being An American

Nothing quite like seeing the flag flying in the wind

It’s no secret we have some serious problems in this country. I do not even need to list or link any articles demonstrating this, either; the internet is replete with examples.

However, we have some tremendous benefits living in the United States, and I am grateful for the opportunities we have here. And, even with the problems we have, we have opportunities to address them.

I’ve said this for a while now, but the light shines brightest in the dark. The more troublesome the problem, the brighter the potential solution. It’s one of the reasons I started this website (and podcast with episodes to drop in December 2023!!); there are A LOT of people who could use help, information, knowledge, wisdom, and guidance.

Everything here at The Wealthy Ironworker has grown organically – from people looking for something and coming across the various articles, to others seeking to improve themselves and outlook.

I recognize that depending on your values, you may feel there is another country doing something better. It may even be that you’d like to see some changes. In the melting pot that is the United States, there is a lot to offer, and sometimes we may not get everything right.

Out of all the things I could point to, I’ll condense it down to two specific things: The First Amendment and The Second. Robust free speech and a total ban on censorship is, in my opinion, the only way to preserve freedom. The freedom of religion is another part I wholeheartedly embrace. And The Right to Bear Arms helps to ensure you can preserve not only The First but also your life and liberty.

There are many other reasons – like sheer opportunity, for example – and maybe one day, I’ll explore a series on them, but for now, I’ll end the point by saying I am thankful for The First and Second Amendments.

 

I Am Thankful For Good Friends

We have never been so connected – and yet so isolated. We NEED good friends

This is one that I’m particularly passionate about. After all, I contend many people – and most certainly men – do not have genuine friends. Over the past year, it’s telling the number of men who start nodding their heads in agreement when I say this. You could even say it is a crisis that’s adding to the mental health crisis in our country. With OSHA reporting that, “The suicide rate for construction workers is 4 times higher than in the general population,” having good friends is more important than ever. I can’t help but think how many men would have reached out to someone IF they had someone to reach out and talk with.

To that end, I am extremely grateful for the genuine friends I have. I have a great home life, and strive for a work-life balance like my life depended on it, but there are times when having good, genuine, concerned for your well-being friends is priceless. We all go through things; who do you have that you can count on?

It’s remarkable to me the number of conversations I’ve had over this past year with fellow tradesmen who have been looking for a port in the storm of their life – and have allowed me to invest in them, even just a little bit by simply listening.

Life is tough, even in the best of circumstances, and we all need good friends. I know I am thankful for mine.

 

***IF you are struggling, dealing with depression, anxiety, are downtrodden, and just beaten down, please reach out to SOMEONE – even if that means calling 988 – the suicide hotline. Take time to get – and be – a friend, your life just may depend on it.***

Don’t give in – build resiliency and seek help

I Am Thankful For My God

Everything I am stems from my worldview

This brings me to the last – but most definitely not least (it’s foundational, to be honest) – thing I’m thankful for (5 things seemed like a good number). Indeed, it is the foundation of who I am, how I can approach, deal with, and pour into my wife, kids, work, friends, etc., and affects who I am on EVERY level.

Long-time acquaintances and friends know I do not seek to pour my beliefs down their throats; instead, I’ve sought to be a beacon of light in this cultural darkness. I have tried to be a port in the storm, a listening ear, creating and fostering an atmosphere where people know I’m genuine and authentic – and they can ask me questions or seek advice from me at any time.

In the last 6 months, I can think of several conversations where I have allowed my faith to fuel my interactions; presenting a steady beacon for others to see. I recall the apprentice who needed some advice and sought me out. I remember some other men whom I had just met earlier in the week, and they talked into the evening with me because they lacked the ability to do so in their own life (again, most men do not have a single, genuine friend). I have spoken with others who, having been indifferent to religion, are entering an intellectually curious phase, and I welcome the conversation!

I can recall the advice others have sought when trying to make informed decisions – or even those whom I’ve counseled to not do something they’d regret the rest of their life.

Lastly, I can look at friends who, throughout many years, have been positively influenced by me, my stances, and my genuine concern for them. I know because they’ve told me so.

And all of that is an outward manifestation of who I am – and where I stand – with God. It has framed how I interact with and value my family, work, and those in my realm of influence.

Wrapping This All Up

Wrapping up this gift of thankfulness

Bringing this post to its conclusion, I hope it has given you a more detailed glimpse into who I am, what we are doing here at The Wealthy Ironworker, and, more importantly, I hope it helps you to take stock of your own life. I hope it makes you think about what you are thankful for, what you value, what you cherish, what you appreciate most in this world – and if it has, drop me a line (comment or email), and let me know.

We love to hear how we are changing people’s lives – one at a time.

So, what are you thankful for?